This has to have been one of the most stressful…
You know what they say about assumptions, go on and make one and it really is quite easy to make a giant ass of yourself. To some degree though, we live our lives through making assumptions about all sorts of things. None of us are all knowing and sometimes to make sense of the world we need to make assumptions here and there. I thought I’d share some of the assumptions people make about me now since having gastric bypass surgery.
That I have always been this size.
As life goes on after surgery I’ve met lots of people who didn’t know me prior to it and now having maintained my goal weight for two years, there are people in my life who have always known me to be as I am now. In a conversation at the office the other day one of my colleagues was floored to find out that I had had bariatric surgery and when I showed them a before picture they did the whole, “No that’s not you,” routine.
That I have to eat heaps of small meals to make sure I get ‘enough’.
This one just goes to show me how much of our relationship with food is based on our emotions and psychology not our physicality. When people see how little I eat they then make the assumption that I must have to eat lots of small meals to get ‘enough’. Part of what will give me the long term success of maintaining my weight is that my meal sizes will always be reduced. I can get enough protein and other nutrients in with those three meals so I have no need to have lots of smaller meals a day.
That all of my body and image issues are over.
This one really gets me. No matter how big, small, transformed or enlightened we are all of us will, to some degree, have an issue or five with our bodies. I think it’s very easy to assume now that I’ve finally done what I was always fighting for in terms of getting my weight under control, that suddenly I don’t have any issues with my body anymore. I see people cutting others down because they have something or don’t have an issue the other person has so they can be quick to dismiss other smaller (in their eyes anyway) issues that the person has. In short we’re all allowed to feel how we feel and nobody can or should try and make you feel like you have nothing to worry or complain about just because you’re not morbidly obese anymore.
That I had bariatric surgery to be ‘skinny’.
The reasons I chose to go down the path of having a gastric bypass was out of pure frustration with my weight and because I was worried about my long term health prospects if I didn’t get onto it and sort it out. Yes, being smaller is a great side-effect of that but wasn’t a priority in me weighing up my decision to do this. My son was my main catalyst because I suddenly had the best reason to look after my health and live as long as I possibly could.
That I’ll ever be ‘normal’ again.
No there’s not some magical day in my future when all of the physical effects of the surgery will wear off and I will be able to do whatever I like again. Also the surgery doesn’t get done with a view of being able to reverse it so I won’t be getting my insides put back how they were. This is for life, I made sacrifices and it’s totally okay, I knew what I was getting myself into. In fact I am normal, my normal, and that’s totally okay.
One of the main reasons I blog and one of the main goals I have is to help break perceptions and educate people on what the after effects of bariatric surgery are like in real life. This post is a bit of a whinge to be honest but when things like this come up in my day-to-day life I use these opportunities to help people understand a bit more about weight loss surgery and give them some insight.
This is a long road not an easy one but I do understand why people think some of the things they do as they haven’t been exposed to it before. What are some of the best/worst/annoying/unusual assumptions you’ve had made about you in the lead up to or after bariatric surgery? Comment below and let me know, I’d love to know what you’ve come across out there.