Hi, my name is Melissa and I used to be…
Somehow time has flown and tomorrow is my two year surgiversary! For the uninitiated this is a term often used on weight loss surgery message boards, tomorrow is the two year anniversary of my gastric bypass surgery! What an unexpected two years it has been. Below is a comparison picture of me from November 2013 (my highest weight) and now February 2016!
In the lead up to my surgery so much of my focus was on the actual procedure itself and the stages immediately following. I guess because those bits were such a big deal at the time it was just too much to look past that and wonder where I would be two years later. Looking back, the surgery itself and the six or so months after were really not that long but they did take a lot of organisation, focus and management to make sure I was doing what I needed to.
When I set out on this journey I set myself a goal weight of 65 kilos. At the beginning I didn’t set my heart on reaching it because I knew I was going to lose a significant amount of weight and I didn’t want to be too disapointed if I never reached that magical number. I had never had my weight that low as an adult and didn’t know if it was possible for my body to get there. To my delight I reached my goal weight nine months after surgery.
Now, at my two year post-op point I have managed to maintain my goal weight for 15 months. Aside from actually reaching my goal weight in the first place I think this is the biggest achievement so far. I chose a gatric bypass because I thought it would give me the best chance at long term weight maintenance and so far, so good. The below picture shows the day before surgery (117kg) and now (Feb 2016, 66kg).
Talking about weight, mine is not exactly where I would like it to be at the moment. I try to keep my weight between 63 and 65 kilos so I have a bit of a buffer and don’t go back over my goal weight. After Christmas I was sitting firmly at the 65 kg end of this scale so I got really focussed on my exercise in the New Year. Since I’ve been working on getting fit again I’ve put on 1.5 kilos so I’m almost at the upper limit of where I feel okay (67 is what I REALLY don’t want to go over).
I know that it’s because of the muscle I’ve gained and my clothes are fitting better than when I was at 65 kg just after Christmas so I will keep working on it and I will get it back under 65. Focussing on reducing my weight by two kilos is much easier to cope with mentally than when I knew I had to lose upwards of 60 kilos. The head game is real though and I guess, in a sense, I don’t ever want to feel like I’ve lost control of my weight ever again.
Some of the head stuff is not as easy as it was immediately after surgery. I have found the interest in food that I lost immediately after surgery and for at least those first 6-9 months. I know what drives it now though and know that food doesn’t fix my emotions and never makes a difference when I’m feeling tired. Those things are easier to deal with now because of the perspective I have gained in relation to food and how it affects me over the last two years.
Life really does feel like it’s totally back to normal now. Of course this is a new normal for me, life will never go back to how it was and that’s exactly how it should be. I’m getting really good at working my needs in with my families nutrition wise, also while eating out and in situations where I’m not in control of the food is much easier now too. In these two years I have physically shrunk by over half of my size but in every other way I have gained so much.
I didn’t realise how much of just simply living my life I was missing out on before and make the most of every opportunity I can. I love that I have found a whole new appreciation for exercise and make the most of using my body to its full potential now.
These two years have flown by and while my head has almost caught up to where my body is at I still get pleasntly suprosed by my reflection sometimes and it takes a moment to register that its actually me. I can freely admit that getting dressed in the morning and actually liking how I look hasn’t lost its novelty value.
Have you had bariatric surgery? Did you imagine the point in the process you’re at now and are things as you imagined? Comment below and let me know.